AM I WITH THE RIGHT PARTNER?

Relationship

During a seminar, a woman asked,” How do I know if I am with the right person?”

The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, “It depends. Is that your partner?” In all seriousness, she answered “How do you know?” Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it’s weighing on your mind replied the author.

Here’s the answer.

Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.

People in love sometimes say, “I was swept of my feet.”Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.

Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.

At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.

The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found.

People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.

I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):

The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the Person you found.

SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.

Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a “decision”. Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO..

My Daily Reflections – Day 2

What I focus on in life is what I get. And if I concentrate on how bad I am or how wrong I am or how inadequate I am, if I concentrate on what I can’t do and how there’s not enough time in which to do it, isn’t that what I get every time? And when I think about how powerful I am, and when I think about what I have left to contribute, and when I think about the difference I can make on this planet, then that’s what I get. You see, I recognize that it’s not what happens to you; it’s what you do about it. -W. Mitchell

My Daily Reflections –

You may have chosen to judge the past, and blame yourself and many others for where you are today. That is fine. Do that if you choose to. But at least for sanity’s sake, ask yourself what this behavior has and is truly offering you? When has this behavior take you? At the very least, ask yourself if you are at peace with how you feel about this way of thinking.

Be Thankful Everyday….

There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She told her boyfriend, ‘If I could only see the world, I will marry you.’ One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her. When the bandages came off, she was able to see everything, including her boyfriend. He asked her, ‘Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?’ The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind. The sight of his closed eyelids shocked her. She hadn’t expected that. The thought of looking at them the rest of her life led her to refuse to marry him. Her boyfriend left her in tears and days later wrote a note to her saying: ‘Take good care of your eyes, my dear, for before they were yours, they were mine.’ This is how the human brain often works when our status changes. Only a very few remember what life was like before, and who was always by their side in the most painful situations.

Life Is a Gift
Today before you say an unkind word –
Think of someone who can’t speak.
Before you complain about the taste of your food –
Think of someone who has nothing to eat.
Before you complain about your husband or wife –
Think of someone who’s asking GOD to provide a suitable companion.
Today before you complain about life –
Think of someone who went too early to heaven.
Before you complain about your children –
Think of someone who desires children but They are not able to have any.
Before you argue about your dirty house someone didn’t clean or sweep –
Think of the people who are living in the streets.
Before whining about the distance you drive –
Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.
And when you are tired and complain about your job –
Think of the unemployed, the disabled, and those who wish they had your job.
But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another –
Remember that not one of us is without sin and we all answer to one MAKER.
And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down –
Put a smile on your face and thank GOD you’re alive and still around.

My Road To Happiness

Cultivate simplicity.
Laugh at your own complexity.
Share and analyze it with others.
When you use words, have them say what you mean.
If there is a key to your mystery, let people have it so they can understand you.

Act in fresh, spontaneous, freeing ways.
Speak to someone who appears forbidding.
Make a telephone call you’ve been afraid of.
Break a heavy silence.
Write a letter that has long been written in your mind.
Help someone to smile or laugh.

In your imagination walk up a mysterious street you have long wondered
or dreamed about.
Study its detail and make it real.
Don’t worry about what other people think.
Most of them are thinking about themselves.
Laugh uproariously if you feel like it.
Go to a park and ride a swing.
When you look at a picture, a bird or an ocean — when you hear a poem,
the wind or a cello — cry if you are moved and want to.

Find a quiet place (at least within you), sit down, take a deep breath,
exhale slowly, quiet the mind.
Anxiety is a notorious foe of life, peace and love.
If you’re at ease with yourself, others can be at ease with you too.
Since no one is an island, quit acting like one.
Reach out for help, ask for it, and humbly admit your need.
And when you perceive need in someone else, offer help without feeling superior.
Survival means banding together; justice requires it.

Life is brief, measured by a few decades.
Do you realize this?
Has this absolute reality permeated your consciousness?
What can you do?

Blue Hills

Strip and dive into the water.
Drop the other shoe. Say, “Yes.”
In a far moment some future earthling, or a visitor from outer space, may observe remnants of our lives and exclaim: “These were good people. They were truly our brothers and sisters. I wish we could have known them.”

THE DEFINITIVE MALE CHAUVANISTIC

HUSBAND OF THE YEAR AWARDS:

The honorable mention goes to: THE UNITED KINGDOM

Followed closely by The UNITED STATES OF AMERICA

And then POLAND

But 3rd Place must go to GREECE

It was very very close but the runner-up prize was awarded to SERBIA

But the winner of the husband/partner of the year is: Ireland!
Ya gotta love the Irish. The Irish are true romantics. Look, he’s even holding her hand…

Woman has Man in it;
Mrs. has Mr. in it;
Female has Male in it;
She has He in it;
Madam has Adam in it;
Okay, Okay, it all makes sense now…
I never looked at it this way before

Ever notice how all of women’s problems start with MEN?

MENtal illness !
MENstrual cramps
MENtal breakdown
MENopause
GUYnecologist

AND

When we have REAL trouble, it’s a HISterectomy.

Around The Corner There Is A Friend

Around the corner I have a friend,
In this great city that has no end,
Yet the days go by and weeks rush on,
And before I know it, a year is gone.
And I never see my old friends face,
For life is a swift and terrible race,
She knows I like her just as well,

As in the days when I rang her bell.
And she rang mine but we were younger then,
And now we are busy, tired gals
Tired of playing a foolish game,
Tired of trying to make a name.

‘Tomorrow’ I say! ‘I will call on Jane
Just to show that I’m thinking of her.’
But tomorrow comes and tomorrow goes,
And distance between us grows and grows.
Around the corner, yet miles away,
‘Here’s a telegram madam,’ ‘ Jane died today.’
And that’s what we get and deserve in the end.
Around the corner, a vanished friend.

Remember to always say what you mean.
If you love someone, tell them.
Because when you decide that it is the right time it might be too late…

Seize the day.

P.S. This poem was forwarded to me by one of my colleagues as a chain letter. I removed all the scary threats that could happen if the recipients fail to forward it to others. I can relate to this poem ’cause I am not good at keeping in touch even though I think of them often.

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